Thursday, June 21, 2012

Advice for future children

No I'm not pregnant, but a few things had me thinking about writing a post like this.  First, a blogsite I belong to (20sb.net) was asking for posts about what we would say to ourselves five years ago, and then there was this little cutie posted out in the online world of Facebook and the Timesunion Blogosphere.  Ultimately I started thinking about how I would have done things differently and how I would encourage my future kids to prolong their youth because before your know it you're grown up and it kind of sucks. 

I was always that kid who couldn't wait to grow up.  I had a plan and it was going to be great.  I was going to go to college, be married by twenty-five, and start popping out kids by thirty.  My paternal grandmother always told me to get out there and make my own money so that I never had to depend on a man.  Given the circumstances, she was a divorcee with three kids, this was actually great advice.  I vowed to myself I would make my own money.  I would develop a career.  A man and family were last on the list.  Ultimately I thought I would be on top of the world.  Well, here I am a year from thirty.  I'm a married first-time homeowner with a college education and no kids.  I'm working hard on that career, equally as hard on home repairs, and although I guess I'm technically on target with my life-long plan I can honestly say I'm not sure that I'm where I wanted to be in life.  I have just as many bills coming in as I do income and as my Uncle Richie says, "it's all relative."  I sincerely don't think more money would make me any happier but I just kind of feel like this is it??? Is this really what I rushed through my childhood for??

So here's my advice for my future kids, my future nieces and nephews, and any youth I can catch the ear of:  Don't Rush.  Wait until your at least thirty to get married and don't worry about having malformed children, plenty of people have kids well into their thirties and they come out just fine. Plus, by the time you are thirty you'll have a good handle on who you are, what standards you've set for yourself and dare I say what BS you are willing to put up with.  But know this: you're bound to have heartache. I'm sorry that I have no advice for how to avoid it.  As for education, go to school for multiple degrees.  Prolong the inevitable of joining the real world.  Before you have a house and bills and a boat-load of responsibilities get out there and travel.  Listen to me here: you will never have the money to go back for your masters or to go to Tahiti once you strap on the old ball-and-chain of responsible adulthood.  Once you join the cult of adulthood, you will have to scrimp and save to take a vacation and then panic for months afterwards if you've cut yourself short for future bills.   Seriously, it's a vicious cycle.  Ultimately just make sure that when you get to be middle aged that your awesome memories outweigh any possible regrets you may have.  Don't settle for typical, aim to be legendary.

2 comments:

  1. wow no it some of these kids would only listen... too bad some of them are doomed to meet a fate we as a more experienced adults know all too well but the smart ones will give it a though but most will do what they want anyways... good advice as always though at least someone is trying to save em'

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  2. Great advice! And I am not just saying that because I agree. You can't count on tomorrow and what that brings, but you have to enjoy today - if that means home reno, vacations, date nights, more degrees, career advancement - whatever your dreams are live them and enjoy them!
    Cheers to being 29 and owning it!

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